I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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