im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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