Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
