There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
