how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas