i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
