Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
In other news, I just burned my penis
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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