your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
