I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
He uses pillows to masturbate.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
