Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
