Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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