This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize