the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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