she was so not down for the gang bang
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
