Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize