end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I touched a dick in church today
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
