In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I got inside last night via doggy door
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
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