we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
