Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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