And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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