physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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