I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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