but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize