I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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