Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Randomize
