Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
why is half of my head shaved?
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