yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Randomize
