happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
