she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
