oh god the rape fog is back!
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
