I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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