I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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