Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
