So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
All I want is dick and wine.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize