i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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