I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
