yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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