ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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