WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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