Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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