That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
