he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
