clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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