Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize