I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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