i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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