i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
