Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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