he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
