We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Mom said you looked used
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
