Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Randomize
