Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
